Canucks Christmas gifts from the Canucks blogosphere
In the spirit of the season, your favorite Canucks bloggers and Twitterers got together to suggest some special Christmas presents for each of your favorite Vancouver Canucks.
To Roberto Luongo from Alix Wright (Canucks Hockey Blog)
A Marty Brodeur voodoo doll so he can be the starting goalie (for Team Canada) in February.
To Kevin Bieksa from Christopher Golden (@lyteforce)
The best gift I, or anyone for that matter, can give Bieksa this Christmas is a nice plaid flannel shirt. It would provide both comfort and stability and remind him his best games were built on the rugged simplicity. It says to people that “I’m a simple guy who can knock your lights out.” It also says blue collar and need I say more?
To Christian Ehrhoff from Alix Wright
A German chocolate mansion.
To Sami Salo from Richard Loat (Canucks Hockey Blog)
Some Ikea furniture. I hear the Finnish on that Swedish furniture is a very sturdy. Nearly break proof.
To Willie Mitchell from J.J. Guerrero (Canucks Hockey Blog)
A contract extension. Name another Canucks defenseman who is tough, dependable and can play against the other team’s top lines on a nightly basis. Neither can I.
To Ryan Johnson from Cam Davie (Canucks Army)
A decent PK coach. He is a fantastic penalty killer, but he gets NO help on the PK, specifically from the defence pairings.
To Alex Burrows from J.J. Guerrero
Blow-up dolls of both Sedins seeing that he can’t score without them.
To Tanner Glass from Guts MacTavish (24 Hours Vancouver)
For starters I’d like give him Mason Raymond’s wheels, Daniel Sedin’s hands and Darcy Hordichuck’s ‘gig.
To Ryan Kesler from Missy (Canuck Puck Bunny)
A t-shirt saying “If Chuck Norris were up against 7 Rangers, he’d call ME!”
To Steve Bernier from Sean Zandberg (Nucks Misconduct)
I’d like to give Steve Bernier a new set of hands for Christmas.
To Mason Raymond from John Bollwitt (johnbollwitt.com)
For our dear Mason Raymond, my first thought is to reverse his number and give him 12 drummers drumming for Christmas. But that’s not a cop-out. Oh no, far from it.
Those drummers are marching him in and welcoming him into becoming a man among men. A true goal scorer. A guy who has finally been able to have his hands catch up to his feet, giving us dazzling displays of putting the puck into the net as of late.
Seriously, do we not remember the days when he first cemented his name onto the Canucks bench? We all had high hopes that one day, he’ll be… good? Maybe? He was fast, but he wasn’t that… good. Or great. He was still bright eyed and learning what the NHL was all about.
But now, I think he’s finally arrived this season, and he’s marched his way into being a hell of a goal scorer. The drums play for him. They welcome him from being the new kid to a man among men.
That and I’d get him a football.
I’d give Daniel a robotic exoskeleton to protect him from any further injuries. The Canucks need him to be healthy if they’re going to do anything in the playoffs.
To Alex Edler from J.J. Guerrero
I’d give him a Mattias Ohlund jersey.
To Darcy Hordichuk from Richard Loat
Brass knuckles. Maybe if he wins a fight or two he’ll go back to enforcing the way he’s supposed to.
To Mikael Samuelsson from Cam Davie (Canucks Army)
A permanent spot on the 2nd line. When playing with Kesler and Raymond, that is a legitimate 2nd line, and Sammy has flourished. When he is moved around, he seems lost.
To Mathieu Schneider from J.J. Guerrero
The will to do what’s right for him at this point of his career.
To Aaron Rome from J.J. Guerrero
I’d give Aaron Rome some of Marc Crawford’s hair.
To Andrew Raycroft from Richard Loat
A Blackberry with UberTwitter on it. If he’s riding pine the rest of the season, I want to see some real-time tweets from the guy.
To Henrik Sedin from Clayton Corley (Opiated Sherpa)
I’m going to wrap up a new placeholder & hook, with an engraved plaque that reads, “2010 Olympic Bronze Medal – Vancouver.”
To Jannik Hansen from Richard Loat
Lunch. Then I’d finally get to meet the guy. He has to know who’s chief in command of his fan club sooner or later.
To Rick Rypien from J.J. Guerrero
A female fan to throw her undies at him. Seriously, Ryp’s won more fights than Jeff Cowan ever did and has scored just as much.
To Pavol Demitra from J.J. Guerrero
A speedy return to the lineup. Demitra-Wellwood-Bernier or Bernier-Wellwood-Samuelsson aren’t bad options for a third line, folks.
To Kyle Wellwood from Richard Loat
Willie Mitchell’s stick because I’m tired of hearing “Just out of the reach of Wellwood. He just can’t get his stick on it.”
To Shane O’Brien from Brian Wawryshyn (Canucks Corner)
I would give Shane O’Brien Pat Quinn’s Irish temper. O’Brien could be a much more effective player if he had the mean streak of the big Irishman Quinn.