Apr 282010
 

- And so we play the Hawks again. This city is jazzed. Everyone wants some redemption for last year. Saturday is a longggg wait to see game 1. It can’t come soon enough. The Canucks are a better team this year. We have our secret weapon highest scoring muppet around…Mikael Samuelsson! The Art Ross winner Hanky “Pinata” Sedin! But really the best improvement is the vibe the whole team has this season. Maybe they talked to the Dali Lama this summer or maybe it’s just the fantastic Ryan Walter’s leadership values but they are very zen this season. The biggest thing that killed them last year was getting too emotional and losing their composure against the Hawks. They are calm kittens. Nothing is harshing their mellow these days. If they get behind playing the Hawks this time around things will be different.

- Seriously, Chelsea Dagger is the worst song on earth. Maybe even space. Don’t the Blackhawks know it’s about rampant drug use? What are they saying about themselves? Speaking of the Hawks, I found some secret facts about them to show everyone that they’re really not that scary*

Jonathan Toews collects ceramic unicorns

Patrick Kane likes to knit hot pink leg warmers and sing along to Justin Bieber in his bathroom

Dustin Byfuglien sleeps with a blowup doll girlfriend named Candy Kisses

*Facts may be totally made up and I have no money to give if I am sued.

- Big Bear was so wonderful in the first round against the Kings. He was all unsunghero-y and it made me incredibly happy. You know how coaches have dog houses? Well I have an Alix House where players that I adore but who are struggling stay. Big Bear has been a resident for months as has Shane baybee and so I am extra pleased for Big Bear.

- Speaking of Shane baybee, he was also very, very good this series. Friends I have that absolutely loathe Shane were even changing their tunes and saying he was awesome.

- I’m starting to think Willie Mitchell is dead and they’re turning him into a cyborg but the cyborg is having trouble learning how to hold Willie’s long stick.

- Yesterday the Vancouver government had “Canucks day” down at city hall. Seriously after one round! To gain some political points! This might be not quite as bad as the Province asking people to send in their parade routes last year but it’s pretty close. And once again I am left working over time to show that not all Canucks fans are so totally ridiculous. Now Canucks faithful, everyone get out your best jinx reversal dances because we’re going to need them. May I suggest the “Ryan Kesler” ?

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