Yulin’ with the Blog: ‘Twas the Night Before a Canucks Christmas
From all of us here at Canucks Hockey Blog, we wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas and the best of the holiday season as we go “Yulin’ with the Blog.”
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the Roge
Or if you prefer, the barn once called the Garage
Jerseys were hung, sticks put up on the racks
With blocker and pads for Lu and for Lack
The ice was set and zambonied with glee
To be littered with hats should a Canuck score three
From the rafters with banners for Linden and Smyl
Came a man so jolly, dressed in red, the real deal
Presents he brought for the players and more
Even Alex Burrows as he struggles to score
A gift for Alberts when he’s riding the pine
And for Zack Kassian, whose jersey says 9.
Some have been naughty and some will get coal
But not Lu who’s been solid in goal
65 shutouts Luongo has to his merit
Would have had more were it not for John Garrett
For GM Mike Gillis who can’t make up his mind
And for all referees even though they are blind
Even the visitors get a present to pick
Except for Marchand because he’s too much a dick.
Silent was the arena usually bursting with cheers
Except for the fans concerned with spilling their beers
From Torts, the cusses, the curses they came
Lots more each time the powerplay came up lame
“THIS IS NOT THE PLAY I WAS TALKING ABOUT”
At the top of his lungs, at the players he’d shout.
On Hank, on Dank, on Higgins and Kesler!
On Weise, on Welsh, on (not Shea but) Yannick Weber!
“Merry Christmas!” the jolly man shouted, he was finished at last
He even left presents for Canucks of the past
Like that rascal Matt Cooke even though he’s an ass
And for Trevor Linden who once threw a man through the glass
To BMo, Nazzy and Bert who did bless
The Canucks with the line The Westcoast Express
Merry Christmas, Mason Raymond, who falls for no reason
And to Mats Sundin who just played half a season
Gifts for the coaches, Crawford, Quinn and AV
There were even holiday wished for good ol’ Rick Ley
Harry Neale got something and so did Roger Neilson
But damn straight, the red man ignored Mike Keenan
To Bure, to Odjick, to Adams and more
For their run to the Cup in 1994
To the Blackhawks and Bruins against who vengeance we swore
For the slashes, the punches, slew foots to the floor
But truce for tonight, for all those holiday reasons
There’s plenty of time to fight during the season
Tonight, however, we’ll drink to Saint Nick
Except for Marchand, who’s still quite a dick
Merry Christmas to all, Canucks from near and from far
And especially to all the fans, because Canucks we all are.
A special thanks to: Kristina Sinclair from the Rosedale on Robson, Chris Palliser and Holly Conway from The Beat 94.5, Matt Sekeres and Karen Thomson from TEAM 1040, Jordan Bowman from the Legion of Blog, Patrick Johnston from Canucks Army, and friends of the blog, Nicole Van Zanten and Justin Ho.