May 062010
 

Oh how naive I was yesterday. Was game three the best game ever? Not by a long shot. It was painful for large stretches and left me almost physically sick for hours after it was over. I really am just a very bad loser. But you know what? Today I woke up with a feeling that it was awesome. It was my first ever playoff game and I wouldn’t give that experience back for anything. Doolins treated me ridiculously well and sent me, my guest, and two lovely guys that were also contest winners to the game in a LIMO. Our section was fun and rowdy and we had a really good view of the ice. The crowd was absolutely deafening during the anthems and the opening few minutes. You know what I never knew I was missing in my life until last night? Taking part in a refs you suck chant with 17 000 other angry people. It is ridiculously fun and enchanting.

The Canucks did have some sustained pressure on Neimi and the Hawks but it just wasn’t enough. He had a strong game but the Canucks could have cashed in on some of his rebounds. It flummoxed me all game why the Hawks were coming down every rush and crashing Luongo’s net and the Canucks seemed to not want to do the same to Neimi.

Luongo has been very good recently but not last night. Those rebounds CANNOT happen. He has to eat those pucks like a delicious sammich. Almost every Hawks goal last night was a nice little gift for them two feet from his crease. No! No! No!

Oh the refs were truly awful. I don’t think I’ve ever seen officials call a game quite that bad. Who knew that Hank Sedin could have his stick slashed right out of his hand and not get a call? You can bowl right into a goalie without trying to stop and get off home free. Oh and of course you can send the goalie in on the puck and have it count as a goal! I didn’t think Luongo looked like a puck but apparently I’m misguided.

Now that I’ve got that off my chest I feel so much better but it wasn’t the refs that cost the Canucks this game. They had their own chances on the power play and couldn’t cash in. They couldn’t pounce on rebounds. They got overly emotional, made stupid decisions, and let the Blackhawks push them around. It infuriates me that they heard constant questions from the media for WEEKS about not being able to contain Byfuglien and then let him score a bloody hat trick.

This series is by no means over. But Luongo is going to have to be a hell of a lot better and the Canucks are going to have to get meaner and smarter if they want to beat them this time around.

Apr 282010
 

- And so we play the Hawks again. This city is jazzed. Everyone wants some redemption for last year. Saturday is a longggg wait to see game 1. It can’t come soon enough. The Canucks are a better team this year. We have our secret weapon highest scoring muppet around…Mikael Samuelsson! The Art Ross winner Hanky “Pinata” Sedin! But really the best improvement is the vibe the whole team has this season. Maybe they talked to the Dali Lama this summer or maybe it’s just the fantastic Ryan Walter’s leadership values but they are very zen this season. The biggest thing that killed them last year was getting too emotional and losing their composure against the Hawks. They are calm kittens. Nothing is harshing their mellow these days. If they get behind playing the Hawks this time around things will be different.

- Seriously, Chelsea Dagger is the worst song on earth. Maybe even space. Don’t the Blackhawks know it’s about rampant drug use? What are they saying about themselves? Speaking of the Hawks, I found some secret facts about them to show everyone that they’re really not that scary*

Jonathan Toews collects ceramic unicorns

Patrick Kane likes to knit hot pink leg warmers and sing along to Justin Bieber in his bathroom

Dustin Byfuglien sleeps with a blowup doll girlfriend named Candy Kisses

*Facts may be totally made up and I have no money to give if I am sued.

- Big Bear was so wonderful in the first round against the Kings. He was all unsunghero-y and it made me incredibly happy. You know how coaches have dog houses? Well I have an Alix House where players that I adore but who are struggling stay. Big Bear has been a resident for months as has Shane baybee and so I am extra pleased for Big Bear.

- Speaking of Shane baybee, he was also very, very good this series. Friends I have that absolutely loathe Shane were even changing their tunes and saying he was awesome.

- I’m starting to think Willie Mitchell is dead and they’re turning him into a cyborg but the cyborg is having trouble learning how to hold Willie’s long stick.

- Yesterday the Vancouver government had “Canucks day” down at city hall. Seriously after one round! To gain some political points! This might be not quite as bad as the Province asking people to send in their parade routes last year but it’s pretty close. And once again I am left working over time to show that not all Canucks fans are so totally ridiculous. Now Canucks faithful, everyone get out your best jinx reversal dances because we’re going to need them. May I suggest the “Ryan Kesler” ?

Apr 122010
 

And so it all begins on Thursday. Canucks/Kings round one. The most wonderful time of year where you feel sick to your stomach from the moment you wake up to the moment the puck drops and well beyond that. Many consume alcohol like a freshman on spring break in Miami. Every save, every goal, you feel your heart pounding in your chest.

The Canucks match up well against the Kings. I think it should be a fun series. They have a bunch of young talent. We have twins! I’m a wee bit nervous about Luongo and the defence but hey remember when Canucks fans worried about scoring? At least this is refreshing change! We have the 2nd best offence and the Art Ross winner. I’m not going to say we can take the Kings because that just seems silly for a Canucks fan to do but I will say that the majority of the Kings are toddlers. Maybe the playoffs will scare them. Hanky is a scoring monster?

I am SO happy Hanky did win the Art Ross. This time I might as well bake him a whole massive CAKE. Amazing. Franchise best for the Canucks now too. Of course the NHL could barely bring themselves to acknowledge it yesterday but that’s just typical. There’s only two stars in this league! If your name doesn’t rhyme with Blovechkin or Brosby we’re not going to waste our time! But hey I’m sure it’s not bugging Hank and Vancouver is happy.

Playoff predictions: I decided to do them INCREDIBLY scientifically. I used the S quotient and the PB quotient to determine who moves on from the first round.
S = amount of Swedes
PB = amount of prairie boys

San Jose VS Colorado San Jose has 4 PB and 2 S. Colorado has 3 PB and zero S. Sharks in 5 games.

Chicago VS Nashville
Chicago has 5 PB and 2 S. Nashville has 4 PB and 1 S. Blackhawks in 6.

Vancouver VS LA Vancouver has 8 PB and 4 S (no WONDER I love this team) LA has 2 PB and 2 S. Canucks in 5.

Detroit VS Phoenix Detroit has 4 PB and 8 S. Phoenix has 5 PB and zero S. Redwings in 4.

Washington VS Montreal Washington has 8 PB and 1 S. Montreal has 1 PB and zero S. Washington in 4.

New Jersey VS Philadelphia
New Jersey has 3 PB and zero S. Philadelphia has 7 PB and 1 S. Flyers in 5.

Buffalo VS Boston Buffalo has 1 PB and 1 S. Boston has 2 PB and zero S. Tie breaker needed: BC boys! Buffalo has 1 BC boy. Boston has 2 BC boys. Bruins in 7.

Pittsburgh VS Ottawa
Pittsburgh has 1 PB and zero S. Ottawa has 3 PB and 2 S. Ottawa in 6.

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